ROTTEN TOMATOES: Joseph Kastner

JOSEPH KASTNER

Agrees with the Tomatometer 75% of the time.

Biography: Age: 17 Relationship Status: Single Current Place of Education: Marquette University Favorite Vacation Spot: Walt Disney World Last Visit to WDW: June 8th - 14th, 2004 Next Visit to WDW: 2005 I started off with MickeyMoose's House of Mouse back in August 2001 focusing on the four Walt Disney World. Eventually the site added sections on Disneyland and Disney films. This is when The Moose Hole was born. By August 2002, The Moose Hole had outgrown its current surroundings and it moved to a much better Geocities server. Once again, we grew too big for our own good and we happily, with the help of Microsoft Frontpage, moved the site to its current Hostultra.com server. The Moose Hole is now celebrating its second year on the web and its been growing bigger more then ever. The current version of the site has over 54 movies reviews, several product and poster stores, a DVD Department, movie trailers, and much more. Why don't you check us out and discover something for yourself.

Favorites: The Moose's 2004 List 1. The Passion of the Christ ***** out of 5 (A+) 2. Kill Bill (Volume II) **** 1/2 (A) 3. Spider-Man 2 **** 1/2 (A) 4. Harry Potter & the Prisoner of Azkaban **** 1/2 (A) 5. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind **** 1/2 (A-) 6. Shrek 2 **** 1/2 (A-) 7. Miracle **** (B+) 8. Big Fish **** (B+) 9. The Alamo **** (B) 10. Jersey Girl **** (B) 11. Anchorman **** (B) 12. The Village *** 1/2 (C+) 13. Van Helsing *** 1/2 (C+) 14. Hellboy ***1/2 (C+) 15. King Arthur *** 1/2 (C+) 16. 50 First Dates ***1/2 (C+) 17. The Terminal *** (C) 18. The Ladykillers *** (C) 19. Teacher's Pet *** (C) 20. Home on the Range *** (C-) 21. Around the World in 80 Days *** (C-) 22. I, Robot ** 1/2 (D+) 23. Hidalgo **1/2 (D+) 24. Godsend ** (D) 25. Troy * 1/2 (D-) 26. The Day After Tomorrow * (F+) I, Robot The Village Collateral Sound of Thunder Mr. 3000 Shark Tale Ladder 49 J.M. Barrie's Neverland The Incredibles The Ring 2 The Spongebob Squarepants Movie National Treasure Ocean's Twelve Meet the Fockers 5 - A+ 4 1/2 - A/A- 4 - B+/B 3 1/2 - B-/C+ 3 - C/C- 2 1/2 - D+ 2 - D 1 1/2 - D- 1 - F+ & below

Publications: Moose Hole, Movie Gurus, Movie-Vault.com, MovieFreak.com, MovieJustice

Total Reviews: 167

Location: Delafield, Wisconsin

LISTING OF ALL REVIEWS & ARTICLES

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Showing 1 - 50 of 167

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Rating	T-Meter	Title \| Year	Add Date (default)

Fresh 4.5/5	Fresh 97%	The Lady Vanishes (1938)	" The Lady Vanishes stands apart from many of Hitchcock's earlier British films as one of the best of the first half of his filmmaking career" — Moose Hole Posted Mar 8, 2006
Fresh 4.5/5	Fresh 97%	The 39 Steps (1935)	" The 39 Steps truly stands the test of time as one of the director's most stimulating spy-thrillers from his early film career" — Moose Hole Posted Mar 8, 2006
Fresh 4.5/5	Fresh 89%	Blackmail (1929)	" The rape scene in particular is especially mesmerizing ... The eerily penetrating silence of the moment and what is not seen, leaving the diabolical deed to the device of our own imagination" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 23, 2006
Fresh 4/5	Fresh 91%	The Lodger (1926)	" The Lodger is truly a remarkable film, a perfect demonstration of the camera techniques, innovative storytelling, mystery, intrigue , and pure idiosyncrasies which would make Alfred Hitchcock one of the best, if not THE best, director in Hollywood history" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 23, 2006
Rotten 2/5	Fresh 77%	Munich (2005)	" Munich's most glaring weakness, Kushner's screenplay, is so extreme in its revisionist interpretation of historical events it is likely to maker even pseudo-'documentarian' Michael Moore blush" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 23, 2006
Fresh 4.5/5	Fresh 83%	King Kong (2005)	" *Peter Jackson's King Kong* is truly a rare motion picture event that can honestly be defined as an epic in every capacity of the word*" — Moose Hole* Posted Dec 20, 2005
Fresh 4/5	Rotten 56%	The Polar Express (2004)	" The Polar Express is at best a sub par family feature and at worst barely even a mediocre holiday 'classic' with no true sense of story or meaning" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 18, 2005
Fresh 5/5	Rotten 40%	The Island (2005)	" *Unfortunately it seems as though The Island, easily this year's most innovative and startling motion-picture event, will likely go unnoticed by a majority of mainstream American audiences" — Moose Hole* Posted Dec 18, 2005
Fresh 4/5	Fresh 78%	Red Eye (2005)	" *What Steven Spielberg did for sharks and the beach with Jaws* Wes Craven and Red Eye will do for airplanes, hands down*" — Moose Hole* Posted Dec 18, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5	Fresh 75%	The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe (2005)	" The Chronicles of Narnia remains true to both C.S. Lewis's epic vision of the whimsical world of Narnia and all those who inhabit it and the Christian undertones which encompass the plot and character developments of the entire book series" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 18, 2005
Fresh 4/5	Rotten 36%	Chicken Little (2005)	" Chicken Little is surprisingly original, truly a credit to Walt Disney Pictures and the film's creators, with a balancing of heart-warming and emotionally inviting family values with analytic humor for each member of the family" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 18, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A)	Fresh 74%	Wedding Crashers (2005)	" Wedding Crashers is amoral, raunchy and sophomoric but combined with its sweet-hearted romanticism and touching message it marks itself as the funniest movies this year" — Moose Hole Posted Jul 22, 2005
Rotten 3/5 (C+)	Fresh 83%	Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)	" *Tim Burton�s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory* is not so much a failure, far be it from that to be sure, as it is a disappointment*" — Moose Hole* Posted Jul 21, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A)	Fresh 73%	War of the Worlds (2005)	" The originative and visually stunning first half saves the film from whatever shortcomings its weaker second half, particularly its conclusion, may deliver" — Moose Hole Posted Jul 8, 2005
Fresh 5/5 (A+)	Fresh 85%	Batman Begins (2005)	" Batman Begins triumphantly returns the Dark Knight to his long since forgotten former glory which existed in the time of Tim Burton�s original big screen adaptation" — Moose Hole Posted Jun 29, 2005
Fresh 5/5 (A+)	Fresh 80%	Cinderella Man (2005)	" Ron Howard's commanding direction and Russell Crowe�s competently driven performance unanimously makes Cinderella Man the single most impressive feat this year" — Moose Hole Posted Jun 3, 2005
Fresh 4/5 (B)	Rotten 31%	The Longest Yard (2005)	" The Longest Yard fulfills what it set out to accomplish which was to deliver a load of cheap laughs to its audience in a senseless piece of comedic entertainment" — Moose Hole Posted May 27, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 80%	Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (2005)	" Revenge of the Sith secures its rightful place as the best of the prequel series and the third best film within the entire six-part saga" — Moose Hole Posted May 19, 2005
Fresh 5/5 (A+)	Fresh 97%	The Empire Strikes Back (1980)	" The Empire Strikes Back is quite easily the most emotionally gut-wrenching, visually stunning, and cinematically inspiring films of all time" — Moose Hole Posted May 16, 2005
Rotten 3/5 (C-)	Rotten 41%	Kicking and Screaming (2005)	" Kicking and Screaming truly devotes itself to its message of �just having fun�, which sadly results it a rather mediocre film and an even worse example for children" — Moose Hole Posted May 13, 2005
Rotten 1/5 (F+)	Rotten 39%	Kingdom of Heaven (2005)	" *There truly can be no genuine characterization of Kingdom of Heaven* then to say that it is in a sense nothing more then an atheist�s wet-dream*" — Moose Hole* Posted May 7, 2005
Rotten 3/5 (C-)	Fresh 60%	Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)	" Sadly audiences will need a guide of their own just to grasp one bit of material from the complex and ultimately bewildering Hitchhiker�s Guide to the Galaxy" — Moose Hole Posted Apr 29, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 77%	Sin City (2005)	" Sin City is nonetheless nothing short of visually arresting entertainment in the best sense of the word and serves as one of the more innovative film projects in recent years." — Moose Hole Posted Apr 2, 2005
Rotten 3/5 (C+)	Fresh 86%	Garden State (2004)	" Art imitates life � the prospects of what might have been make it nearly unbearable at times, but when all is said and done you do not regret having taken the ride" — Moose Hole Posted Mar 24, 2005
Rotten 2/5 (D)	Rotten 20%	The Ring Two (2005)	" The sequel�s tagline which states 'fear comes full circle' is in fact a subliminal reference to the toilet bowl in which this horror remake franchise was flushed down into" — Moose Hole Posted Mar 18, 2005
Rotten 3/5 (C)	Fresh 64%	Robots (2005)	" *If Robots* has taught us anything of value, it is this � procuring the perfected art form is better left to the professionals, also known as Pixar*" — Moose Hole* Posted Mar 11, 2005
Rotten 2.5/5 (D+)	Rotten 29%	Be Cool (2005)	" Who needs satire or parodies when you have a film out there that is willing, intentionally or not, to make fun of itself at the expense of others?" — Moose Hole Posted Mar 4, 2005
Fresh 4/5 (B+)	Rotten 45%	Constantine (2005)	" Constantine sophistically blurs the lines between theistic principles and �Da Vinci Code� embellishment to entertain even the least spiritual amongst us" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 25, 2005
Fresh 4/5 (B)	Fresh 68%	Hitch (2005)	" Hitch more then states the obvious when it comes to relationships ... but does provide with an opportunity to take that special someone out to catch a charming romantic comedy" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 11, 2005
Rotten 1/5 (F+)	Fresh 84%	Fahrenheit 9/11 (2004)	" Fahrenheit 9/11 is nothing more then a stage from which Moore can push his left-wing propaganda down the throats of his callable audience" — Moose Hole Posted Feb 7, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A)	Fresh 97%	Sideways (2004)	" *You will be able walk away from Sideways* with a new view on life, on how we need not be overtly optimistic or pessimistic but instead be content with what life gives us*" — Moose Hole* Posted Feb 4, 2005
Fresh 4/5 (B)	Fresh 100%	The Return of Martin Guerre (1984)	" The Return of Martin Guerre successfully bucks the trend of foreign releases being unable to maintain the same level of intensity and enthusiasm crossing the ocean" — Moose Hole Posted Jan 30, 2005
Rotten 1.5/5 (D-)	Fresh 91%	Million Dollar Baby (2004)	" Michael Moore occultists can find some consolation in the fact that at least some left-wing propagandist piece could walk away with a golden statuette on Oscar night" — Moose Hole Posted Jan 28, 2005
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 88%	The Aviator (2004)	" The Aviator resurrects the aberrant life of Howard Hughes and presents it in the grandiose, nostalgic, and mythological style that only Martin Scorsese could have achieved" — Moose Hole Posted Jan 14, 2005
Fresh 4/5 (B+)	Rotten 52%	The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004)	" The Life Aquatic is without a doubt Wes Anderson�s most ambitious adventure to date as few will judge the face value of the film beyond what is skimmed on the surface" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 28, 2004
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 71%	Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events (2004)	" What to literary zealots may seem like a series of unfortunate events might, in fact, be the first steps of whimsical and fruitful franchise" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 20, 2004
Rotten 2/5 (D)	Rotten 52%	Spanglish (2004)	" Linguist complexities being the least of their problems, Spanglish�s audience is in desperate need of a translator to decipher the message the film is unable to express" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 17, 2004
Rotten 2/5 (D)	Rotten 16%	Alexander (2004)	" Alexander should be a shining example for future generations of intrepid writers on how not to pen an epic historical drama" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 12, 2004
Fresh 4/5 (B+)	Rotten 56%	Ocean's Twelve (2004)	" Ocean�s Twelve, in spite of its failure to surpass the magnificence of the original, does indeed match it based on pure entertainment value" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 10, 2004
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 63%	Love Actually (2003)	" Love actually is all around us � all we have to do is open our eyes and see it for ourselves" — Moose Hole Posted Dec 6, 2004
Fresh 4/5 (B-)	Rotten 43%	National Treasure (2004)	" National Treasure, when all is said and done, is the equivalent of splicing together the History Channel and FX � visually engaging but a serious lack of substance" — Moose Hole Posted Nov 26, 2004
Rotten 2.5/5 (D+)	Fresh 69%	The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (2004)	" It is an absolute travesty to think that the savior of traditional animation is none other then the idiotic slop known as The Spongebob Squarepants Movie" — Moose Hole Posted Nov 23, 2004
Fresh 4.5/5 (A-)	Fresh 97%	The Incredibles (2004)	" The Incredibles manages to engage viewers and connect with them in such a spectacular and seamless way that it makes them - well, incredible." — Moose Hole Posted Nov 5, 2004
Fresh 4/5 (B+)	Fresh 82%	Ray (2004)	" Ray breaks away from the conventional norms, too often tied down by a burdening sense of political correctness, and drastically alters the way we look at the biography genre." — Moose Hole Posted Oct 29, 2004
Fresh 4.5/5 (A)	Fresh 92%	Aladdin (1992)	" Aladdin defied conventions and raised the bar when it came to all future animated films from that moment on, which, to this day, has yet to be lived up to." — Moose Hole Posted Oct 23, 2004
Fresh 4/5 (B)	Fresh 78%	Team America: World Police (2004)	" Whether you�re a �right-wing nut job� or a liberal �wiener�, you�ll find something to laugh at in this film, one side more then other." — Moose Hole Posted Oct 15, 2004
Rotten 2/5 (D)	Fresh 81%	Friday Night Lights (2004)	" SI once called it the greatest sports story of all time � you can�t help but have further disrespect for the magazine after witnessing the travesty that is Friday Night Lights" — Moose Hole Posted Oct 8, 2004
Rotten 3/5 (C-)	Rotten 34%	Shark Tale (2004)	" Whether Shark Tale is a cheap attempt to cash in on the success of Finding Nemo or a lame attempt at pop culture humor, in either case it just simply doesn�t work." — Moose Hole Posted Oct 4, 2004
Fresh 4.5/5 (A)	Rotten 41%	Ladder 49 (2004)	" Ladder 49 is simply nothing short of astounding ... there are few words to accurately describe the high emotions presented through its brilliantly crafted script" — Moose Hole Posted Oct 1, 2004
Rotten 1.5/5 (D-)	Rotten 31%	The Forgotten (2004)	" *No matter how you dress it up, The Forgotten* is yet another disaster in the area of science-fiction thrillers on the trash heap of the box office.*" — Moose Hole* Posted Sep 24, 2004

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5/5 (A+)	SignsOffsite
5/5	The IslandOffsite
4.5/5 (A-)	Finding NemoOffsite
4.5/5 (A)	Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse...Offsite
4.5/5	The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion,...Offsite
4/5 (B)	The Sum of All FearsOffsite
8/10	American WeddingOffsite
4/5 (B+)	Road to PerditionOffsite
4/5 (B-)	National TreasureOffsite
4/5	Chicken LittleOffsite
3.5/5 (B-)	Red DragonOffsite
3.5/5 (C+)	Men in Black IIOffsite
3/5 (C)	Charlie's Angels: Full ThrottleOffsite
3/5 (C+)	UnderworldOffsite
3/5 (C-)	Runaway JuryOffsite
2.5/5 (D+)	ShrekOffsite
2/5 (D)	2 Fast 2 FuriousOffsite
2/5	MunichOffsite
1.5/5 (D-)	HulkOffsite
1/5 (F+)	The Day After TomorrowOffsite

JOSEPH KASTNER

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