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Movies / Upcoming / Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant
Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

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Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)

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Reviews Counted:122

Fresh:46

Rotten:76

Average Rating:4.9/10

Consensus: This overstuffed, scattershot vampire flick suffers from poor characterization and an unwieldy mix of scares and chuckles.

Genre: Horror/Suspense

US Box Office: $13,838,130

Synopsis: The Vampire's Assistant tells the frightening tale of a boy who unknowingly breaks a 200-year-old truce between two warring factions of vampires. Pulled into a fantastic life of misunderstood... The Vampire's Assistant tells the frightening tale of a boy who unknowingly breaks a 200-year-old truce between two warring factions of vampires. Pulled into a fantastic life of misunderstood sideshow freaks and grotesque creatures of the night, one teen will vanish from the safety of a boring existence and fulfill his destiny in a place drawn from nightmares.

14-year-old Darren (Chris Massoglia) was like most kids in his suburban neighborhood. He hung out with his best friend, got decent grades and usually stayed out of trouble. But when he and his buddy stumble upon a traveling freak show, things begin to change inside Darren. That’s the exact moment when a vampire named Larten Crepsley (John C. Reilly) turns him into something, well, bloodthirsty. --© Universal [More]

Starring: Chris Massoglia, John C. Reilly, Ken Watanabe, Salma Hayek

Starring: Chris Massoglia, John C. Reilly, Ken Watanabe, Salma Hayek, Willem Dafoe, Patrick Fugit, Orlando Jones, Jane Krakowski, Josh Hutcherson, Ray Stevenson, Michael Cerveris, Frankie Faison, Kristen Schaal

Director: Paul Weitz

Director: Paul Weitz
Screenwriter: Brian Helgeland, Paul Weitz
Producer: Lauren Shuler Donner, Paul Weitz, Jack Leslie
Composer: Stephen Trask
Studio: Universal Pictures

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1 - 4 of 10

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Reviews for Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

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1 - 20 (sorted by date; Australian critics are listed first)
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Not a thing in this movie is subtle, from its cheesy special effects to its by-the-numbers storyline to its cardboard cutout characters.

Full Review Source: PopMatters | comment Comment
11/19/09
Cynthia Fuchs
Cynthia Fuchs
PopMatters

The funny bits are amusing, the action entertaining, the themes simple, the promise of future tales tantalizing, and the overall feel of the movie is more charming than epic or scary.

Full Review Source: Cinerina | comment Comment
11/19/09
Karina Montgomery
Karina Montgomery
Cinerina

...a watchable (yet undeniably forgettable) endeavor.

Full Review Source: Reel Film Reviews | comment Comment
11/18/09
David Nusair
David Nusair
Reel Film Reviews

...not the pandering exploitation film you might expect. It's not all pentup sexuality, ripened teen flesh and brooding ashen untouchable boys.

Full Review Source: Arkansas Democrat-Gazette | comment Comment
11/07/09
Philip Martin
Philip Martin
Arkansas Democrat-Gazette

A colossal bore of a teen fantasy movie ... crammed with trite, prepackaged lessons.

Full Review Source: Horror Hacker | comment Comment
11/03/09
Maitland McDonagh
Maitland McDonagh
Horror Hacker

Cirque spins its wheels in first installment.

Full Review Source: Illinois Times | comment Comment
11/02/09
Charles Koplinski
Charles Koplinski
Illinois Times

Older moviegoers who can recall the spate of like-minded horror flicks from the 1980s will find much to appreciate.

Full Review Source: Creative Loafing | comment Comment
11/02/09
Matt Brunson
Matt Brunson
Creative Loafing

A fun, energetic adventure with plenty of inoffensive ghoulish touches that should please kid and adult horror buffs alike.

Full Review Source: Commercial Appeal (Memphis, TN) | comment Comment
10/30/09
John Beifuss
John Beifuss
Commercial Appeal (Memphis, TN)

Inept to the core, The Vampire's Assistant never rises to the occasion.

Full Review Source: Advocate (Baton Rouge, LA) | comment Comment
10/30/09
John Wirt
John Wirt
Advocate (Baton Rouge, LA)

To some extent, then, Paul Weitz’s film is parasitically preying on an established trend, but it also has some fresh blood of its own.

Full Review Source: Sunday Times (UK) | comment Comment
10/30/09
Edward Porter
Edward Porter
Sunday Times (UK)

Infinitely more inventive than the sweetly romantic Twilight.

Full Review Source: Observer [UK] | comment Comment
10/30/09
Philip French
Philip French
Observer [UK]

Its high production values - not to mention the world's cutest poisonous spider - can't paper over a tepid and drawn-out plot.

Full Review Source: Daily Mirror [UK] | comment Comment
10/30/09
David Edwards
David Edwards
Daily Mirror [UK]

More of a curio than a serious contender for the next gothic craze.

Full Review Source: SFX Magazine | comment Comment
10/30/09
Dave Bradley
Dave Bradley
SFX Magazine

A movie about the undead that never really makes it out of the grave.

Full Review Source: eFilmCritic.com | comment Comment
10/29/09
Dan Lybarger
Dan Lybarger
eFilmCritic.com

Harry Potter this ain’t. But it’s fun all the same.

Full Review Source: Boston Phoenix | comment Comment
10/29/09
Shaula Clark
Shaula Clark
Boston Phoenix

...an entertaining and engaging entry in the vampire sweepstakes. If it's not A positive, it's certainly worth a B.

Full Review Source: New England Movies Weekly | comment Comment
10/29/09
Daniel M. Kimmel
Daniel M. Kimmel
New England Movies Weekly

This light approach keeps it entertaining, but it also prevents it from being a classic.

Full Review Source: Shadows on the Wall | comment Comment
10/28/09
Rich Cline
Rich Cline
Shadows on the Wall

This is one of the worst films of the year.

Full Review Source: At the Movies | comment 10 Comments
10/26/09
Michael Phillips
Michael Phillips
At the Movies

Bottom-line: this vampire movie sucks.

Full Review Source: Tri-City Herald | comment Comment
10/25/09
Gary Wolcott
Gary Wolcott
Tri-City Herald

There's a lot going on here, but not much of it is very interesting.

Full Review Source: Quad City Times (Davenport, IA) | comment Comment
10/24/09
Linda Cook
Linda Cook
Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)
 
 
1 - 20 (sorted by date; Australian critics are listed first)
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Latest News for Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

October 22, 2009: Critics Consensus: Astro Boy Doesn't Quite Soar
This week at the movies, we've got an anime hero (Astro Boy, with voice work from Kristen Bell and Nicolas Cage); a vampire war ( Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant,... More...

October 19, 2009: Weitz Brothers Form a New Kind of Blood Bond Opens in new window
Not only are Paul and Chris Weitz both directors, but they're both releasing vampire-themed movies within a month of each other this fall. More...

September 27, 2009: New: View the Brand New Trailer Here. Opens in new window
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