Splat 6/10 |
The Caller (2009) |
"Very few actors have the ability to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear and almost have you completely forget you're interacting with pork product. Frank Langella is one of these." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009) |
"Apparently, wizards are no more exempt from the trauma of puberty than Muggles. So much for the power of Magic." |
Brandon Judell |
- |
Beaufort (2008) |
"A Tree Grows in Israel: Joseph Cedar and his Beaufort" |
Brandon Judell |
- |
Beaufort (2008) |
"A Tree Grows in Israel: Joseph Cedar and his Beaufort" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
My Father My Lord (2008) |
"Not unlike Amos Gitai's Kadosh (1999), this is a saga of how an unconscious misinterpretation of religion can disintegrate a family instead of enhancing its life experience." |
Brandon Judell |
- |
Pray the Devil Back to Hell (2008) |
"From a tyrannical leader to child rapists, from the bombing of the infrastructure to starvation, from immeasurable fear to immeasurable courage, Pray the Devil covers it all." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Roman de Gare (2008) |
"Where's Agatha Christie when you need her?" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Sidekick (2008) |
"You can easily tell that the budget was threadbare. In fact, the catering for the crew probably consisted of tap water and peanut-and-jelly sandwiches.
" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Vivere (2008) |
"With truly fine performances, resulting in several riveting scenes, one can easily overlook the dingy cinematography and bothersome sound track to befriend this beguiling look at loneliness." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Air I Breathe (2007) |
"Your appreciation of this circular plotting will have a great deal to do with how tongue-in-cheek you believe the film is" |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
And Then Came Love (2007) |
"Any fans of Oscar Wilde, run for the hills!" |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
The Brave One (2007) |
"In this dreary, cockamamie Valentine to New York City haters, concocted by the father/son team of Roderick and Bruce A. Taylor--a good argument for the government sterilization of a certain family's genes--radio personality Erica Bain (Foster) is confront" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Broken English (2007) |
"Posey's admirers will experience a sensual intoxication that fans always experience when their film goddesses are at their very best." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Bubble (2007) |
"Although the head-shaved, sprightly Eytan Fox might just be a prince of the Kosher New Wave emanating out of Israel for the past decade, he's definitely the king of the faygala division of the same movement." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Darjeeling Limited (2007) |
"Imagine the Three Stooges if they had gone to Yale." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Freshman Orientation (2007) |
"You enter expecting something really stupid, and you wind up with something really clever . . . hysterical . . . wise." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Hot Fuzz (2007) |
"Pegg in a stellar comic performance lifts the film from being a mere applaudable satire to a first-class entertainment. Imagine Jimmy Stewart in "Animal House" or Steve McQueen in "Road Trip."" |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
I Think I Love My Wife (2007) |
"Rock seems to be unintentionally arguing that a black male of any economic class will still go through life with the thought and speech patterns of an uneducated juvenile delinquent who's ready for lockup on "Law and Order."" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Introducing The Dwights (2007) |
"There are films about monstrous overbearing moms, often played by Shelley Winters, and there are those "heartwarming" losing-one's-virginity flicks ("Summer of '42"). Australia's entry into this field consolidates the best elements of both genres." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Macbeth (2007) |
"this production gives The Sopranos a run for the money when it comes to blood-laden butchery. Not once but twice does this Macbeth saunter about splattered with hemoglobin from head to foot, looking very Carrie-like, post-bucket spilling." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Price of Sugar (2007) |
"In the end, this is a fevered tale of an outsider, spurred on by his belief in God, who believes his role in life is to save a people, and for a while it seems he is making a difference. What film can top that nowadays?" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Puccini for Beginners (2007) |
"Puccini is the joyously refreshing romancer that it tries so hard to be. Its success has a lot to do with its casting directors who have peopled both the major and minor roles with aplomb. Even off-off-Broadway legend Helen Hanft has a cameo." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Sicko (2007) |
"SiCKO is, without argument, one of the most important films you'll ever see in your lifetime, which might be rather short depending upon your HMO." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Sydney White (2007) |
"As for the creators' notions that all Jewish boys are Orthodox nerds with flopping peyos and that all homosexuals are drag queens, what the hell! It's only 2007." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Valet (2007) |
"One can see Moliére being jealous of the plot line, and Karl Marx applauding. You see capitalists who exploit the masses do not fare too well in this venture." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Waitress (2007) |
"If you recall the long-running TV series "Alice," you'll pretty much be revisiting familiar territory. Sadly, though, no one belts out, 'Kiss my grits.'" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker (2006) |
"If in 20 or 30 years, Daniel Craig has retired from playing Ian Fleming's stalwart secret agent, the series' producers need look no further than Alex Pettyfer for their new man." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
America: Freedom To Fascism (2006) |
"Russo feels his direction of this film is a brave, seditious deed. The audience I was surrounded by at an advance screening agreed." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
The Black Dahlia (2006) |
"most fun is the high priestess of British stage, Fiona Shaw, who goes over the top as Madeleine's unbalanced mom. Her dinner scene alone with all of her epileptic-like tics and scowls is the grandest of Grand Guignol" |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Comme t'y es belle! (2006) |
"delightfully acted, entertaining, Franco take on the "Sex in the City" lifestyle among the kosher set." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Da Vinci Code (2006) |
"Voltaire, never a huge advocate of organized religion, would be having a fine chuckle nowadays over the current Dan Brown brouhaha." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Devil Wears Prada (2006) |
"Miranda is a distaff version of Donald Trump. There's the power, the arrogance, the success, plus the delicious-to-view unbridled narcissism of an unchecked megalomaniac. She's Hannibal Lector in Dolce & Gabbana." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Factotum (2006) |
"The unsightly Bukowski, in his rumpled attire, and his lead characters (who are most often spins on himself) are fascinating personalities to watch, sort of like little tornados which are more destructive to themselves than to society at large." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Hot House (2006) |
"Essential viewing for any student of Middle-Eastern affairs and scholar of human nature." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Jailbait (2006) |
"Not since Tom Arnold was employed as another horny criminal, one who tried awfully hard to sexually abuse Edward Furlong in 2000's "Animal Factory," has a penitentiary movie been so undone by a charisma-less performance." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
John Tucker Must Die (2006) |
"Criticizing a summer teen movie for not being high art is like yelling at a sociopath for being a serial killer." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Keeping Mum (2006) |
"Just when I thought I'd bore myself to death, having to tell yet another inquirer that the only must-see comedy of the moment was "Little Miss Sunshine," an almost equally fine option has arisen." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Old Joy (2006) |
"if you are not afraid of tranquility, if your favorite part of Antonioni's "Blowup" is the tennis game with the imaginary ball, or if you carry a joint in your Velamints tin, "Old Joy" will be your joy." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Scoop (2006) |
"Allen's Ultimate Schlemiel, no matter what he's being called, Danny Rose, Alvy Singer, or Sid Waterman, is always the same pint-size, uncoordinated, misanthropic, befuddled Jewish intellectual." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Sleeping Dogs Lie (2006) |
"John Waters Meets "Sleepless in Seattle" in this sweet, at-times "tasteless" comic concoction about romance, reputation, the need to confess, and the yearning of society to pigeonhole everyone with a one-dimensional label." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Splinter (2006) |
"As for Olmos, he has achieved more than most could have with an often cliched screenplay ("Homies are getting killed every day. It's sad." "Those are our f***en homeboys back there. Why don't you show a little respect?")." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Tsotsi (2006) |
"Athol Fugard, not an objective observer here, has written that "Tsotsi" just might "rank as one of the best films ever to come out of South Africa," but he may be right." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Venus (2006) |
"What makes Venus unforgettable is not the fine direction and script, or Vanessa Redgrave's startling cameo as Maurice's suffering ex-wife, or Whittaker's award-worthy debut; it's that the viewer can't draw a line between O'Toole's career and Maurice's." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Volver (2006) |
"what we have here is an at-times plaintive love letter to women: a paean to their humor, their loyalty, and especially their ability to survive their encounters with cheating, lying fornicators who employ their penises as weapons of submission." |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005) |
"Underneath all this idiotic crap, inconsistent characterizations, and plot points that are never developed, there is actually a warm, moving story" |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Assault on Precinct 13 (2005) |
"If you need a quick fix of lots of noise, several crashes, numerous bullets- through-the-forehead close-ups, and a cast of slumming talents, run to your nearest Loews." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Beautiful Boxer (2005) |
"Beautiful Boxer: Boys Do Cry" |
Brandon Judell |
Splat |
Casanova (2005) |
"With a vacuum in the lead, uninspired direction, mediocre sword fights, and about as much sexual content as an episode of "The King of Queens," if you feel you have to check this one out, await its DVD release." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
The Constant Gardener (2005) |
"Fiennes has seldom been better, but then has he ever been bad? He’s indeed our Montgomery Clift for this new millennium: sensitive, moral, and yet strong." |
Brandon Judell |
Tomato |
Happy Endings (2005) |
"I don't want to do a politically correct portrayal of gay characters, but I do want them to feel real." |
Brandon Judell |
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