Tomato |
The Baader Meinhof Complex (2009) |
"Hustling like a blockbuster action flick, it's a crash course in domestic terrorism as rock n' roll adrenaline rush." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Bad News Bears (2005) |
"...as far as movie karaoke goes, it kind of works." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Bad Santa (2003) |
"...the most gloriously disgusting, hyperbolically offensive treat this particular Grinch has feasted upon in years.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Bank Job (2008) |
"A tall tale like this one needed to be sprightlier and cheekier; what we get is boring competence." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Basic (2003) |
"How many more chances must we give John Travolta?" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Batman Begins (2005) |
"They finally got it right." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Battle of Shaker Heights (2003) |
"It probably seemed like a good idea at the time." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Be Cool (2005) |
"Probably the crummiest movie I’ve enjoyed in quite some time..." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Because I Said So (2007) |
"A romantic comedy that will make you hate both romance and comedy... oh, and also women." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bee Season (2005) |
"Something like a dream Madonna might've had while she nodded off during Spellbound..." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Before the Devil Knows You're Dead (2007) |
"Lumet shrewdly hangs back, exploiting the long-take potential of his crappy DV and letting scenes play out for what feels like ages, granting this naughty little noir a soul that probably never existed on the page." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bewitched (2005) |
"The nicest thing you can say about Bewitched is that it's better than The Stepford Wives." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Beyond the Sea (2004) |
"Darin's life is just a jumping-off point for The Kevin Spacey Show, which would probably stink like hubris were Spacey not such a dazzling, enthusiastic performer." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Big Bounce (2004) |
"A movie that more than once confuses the line between laid-back and lethargic, it wanders around slack-jawed and weirdly inert.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Birth (2004) |
"Hilariously pretentious, it's Nicole Kidman's funniest movie since The Hours and 2004's barmiest motion picture disaster area." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Birthday Girl (2002) |
"There's a wickedly subversive bent to the best parts of Birthday Girl." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Black Book (2007) |
"A return to magnificently cynical form for director Paul Verhoeven... it takes takes brass ones to set such gaudy, sexy, rip-snorting comic-book entertainment in the shadow of the Holocaust." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Black Dahlia (2006) |
"De Palma's typically graceful camerawork glides gorgeously from one plot point to another, but never settles down long enough to marinate in the heartsick dread this tale so desperately requires." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Black Hawk Down (2001) |
"It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Blade: Trinity (2004) |
"It's sad to see Wesley Snipes standing around on the sidelines while his franchise is hijacked by a bunch of obnoxious, wisecracking white kids." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Blades of Glory (2007) |
"Why is it whenever a male comic actor is desperate for a laugh, he invariably begins licking his fingertips and stroking his nipples? This is a new hack staple -- the physical equivalent of complaining about airplane food." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Blind Swordsman: Zatoichi/Sonatine (2004) |
"Kitano has an enormous amount of fun goofing on Kurosawa archetypes, but here is a film with a song in its heart. (Yup, its a bloody samurai musical.)" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Blood Diamond (2006) |
"As usual, Edward Zwick stumbles upon a really good idea for a movie, and then so thoroughly botches the execution that you're ashamed to still be sitting in the theater after two and a half hours." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Blow (2001) |
"...so kicky and exuberant, you'll find yourself ignoring how fundamentally botched it is. It's a mess, but a glorious mess." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bobby (2006) |
"One of the most unflatteringly photographed movies I've seen in years. A scene between Sharon Stone and Demi Moore comes off more like a bad-facelift pageant, and Lindsay Lohan doesn't look a day over 40." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Body of Lies (2008) |
"Like Alec Baldwin, Russell Crowe is way more fun to watch when he's fat." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Body of War (2008) |
"Donahue and Spiro should've spent more time exploring the human moments and much less time browbeating us with stuff we already know." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Bon Voyage (2004) |
"This throwaway movie has nothing to say, and yet says it with great style.
" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2006) |
"...a fall-on-your-face, pee-in-your-pants screaming riot of wild racism, leering sexism and all-around grotesque intolerance...and believe it or not, it's on the side of the angels." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Born Into Brothels (2004) |
"Watching such a powerful, heart-wrenching story, it's impossible not to be deeply moved-- and nearly as impossible to ignore what a cruddy job the movie does telling it." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Bourne Supremacy (2004) |
"This dark, daring sequel is Bourne's journey to acknowledge the blood on his hands and atone for sins of his half-remembered past. It's a tougher, more complicated movie.
" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Bourne Ultimatum (2007) |
"As propulsive and nerve-jangling as any action flick I've ever seen...but what's most interesting is the harsh moral severity Greengrass has imposed on this series." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Boys Are Back (2009) |
"Even a corrosive influence like yours truly finds something a bit hinky about the motto 'Just Say Yes.' At least when applied to raising children." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Breach (2007) |
"Something like The Devil Wears Prada for boys, Breach boasts terrific acting, a deftly written screenplay, and all the visual pizzazz of a made-for-cable movie." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Break-Up (2006) |
"The most interesting so far of this summer's blockbuster disappointments, the film's willingness to buck audience expectations and at least try for something tougher makes it an admirable failure.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Breakfast on Pluto (2005) |
"There's so much good stuff in here you'll wish it all fit together somehow.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Breaking and Entering (2007) |
"The fact that three major characters are named 'Will,' 'Liv' and 'Bea' should indicate Minghella's commitment to subtlety." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Brick (2006) |
"...a bit of a one-trick pony. Good thing it's such a neat trick.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bride and Prejudice (2005) |
"Director Gurinder Chadha scored a flukey hit with the singularly annoying Bend It Like Beckham. Bride And Prejudice is louder, broader and even more crass." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004) |
"The delightful first picture celebrated Bridget's imperfections. This smug, slapped-together sequel mocks them for cheap laughs." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Bright Leaves (2004) |
"A meandering riff on the dangerous allure of smoking, and more interestingly a meditation on the way motion pictures can preserve our life experiences-- but only to a point." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Bright Young Things (2004) |
"Fry's too smart to oversell contemporary parallels, and also too generous not to find something endearing about all these doomed, stubbornly frivolous folks." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Brokeback Mountain (2005) |
"This year's Million Dollar Baby, it's a similarly plainspoken, straightforward little masterpiece of heartbreak and regret." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Broken Flowers (2005) |
"I doubt there's any other living actor who could turn a simple bit of business like eating sliced carrots into the summer's most exciting and cathartic action sequence." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Broken Lizard's Club Dread (2004) |
"Talk about being the last guy at the buffet table! (Is a genre even viable anymore if it has more parodies than straight entries?)
" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Brother (2001) |
"Always audacious and never less than entertaining, even when it's coming apart at the seams." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Brothers Bloom (2009) |
"Unfortunately, writer-director Rian Johnson is suffering from a fatal case of 'the cutes.'" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Brothers Grimm (2005) |
"...a ragged, sloppy patchwork quilt --but there's magic in it. The movie is a compromised, semi-mangled visit to a very special place." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Brown Bunny (2004) |
"Gallo's haunting, evocative baby has an almost slow-motion, depression-in-action vibe. I don't think I could ever sit through it again--but I'm glad it exists." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Bruno (2009) |
"I don't think Cohen's targets are even being particularly homophobic, they'd just prefer if this crazed, half-naked circus freak would just put his penis away and stop invading their personal space" |
Sean Burns |
RSS Feeds