Splat |
Mad Hot Ballroom (2005) |
"Disappointingly superficial -- even the most interesting children get lost in the constant shuffle on and off-stage. It spends too little time with too many people.
" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Made (2001) |
"Most amazing is that Favreau not only keeps things hilarious even at their darkest, but he plays it all for keeps. There's not a "hip" or glib moment in the whole picture." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Maid in Manhattan (2002) |
"...an airless, prepackaged Julia Roberts wannabe that stinks so badly of hard-sell image-mongering you'll wonder if Lopez's publicist should share screenwriting credit." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Man of the Year (2006) |
"Is there any other comedian who recycles material as often and for as long as Robin Williams? He's the last man in America who thinks Monica Lewinsky jokes are still funny." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Man on Fire (2004) |
"Helgeland's screenplay is too lazy to investigate Washington's viciousness. This promising movie winds up spinning its wheels in a conventionally dopey action plot." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Man on the Train (2003) |
"A tiny little movie with epic, messy emotions hidden up its sleeves, it's a laugh-out-loud comedy that keeps you on the verge of tears." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Man Who Wasn't There (2001) |
"I ain't so sure where the Coens are trying to go with it, and I'm fairly certain the movie gets pretty far away from them somewhere during the second hour." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Manchurian Candidate (2004) |
"A dense and thorough reimagining of the material -- it's got the same mordant cynicism running through its veins, only updated for an even darker, more jittery era.
" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Manderlay (2006) |
"Rude, smarmy and sickly hilarious, Manderlay has a little something to offend everyone... and I wouldn't have it any other way." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
March of the Penguins (2005) |
"Yes kids, we're talking penguin sex. How awesome is that?" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Margot at the Wedding (2007) |
"Grindingly unpleasant yet undeniably hilarious, the movie might as well be called: Squid 2: This Time It's Mommy's Turn." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Marie Antoinette (2006) |
"From scene to scene you sense Coppola has a strong personal connection with both this character and the material, but it's never articulated clearly enough to elevate her film beyond an admirable head-scratcher." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Married Life (2008) |
"...keeps pussyfooting back and forth between asking us to become emotionally invested and playing itself as parody. A better movie could've done both." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Masked and Anonymous (2003) |
"...something is happening here, but you don't know what it is. Do you, Mr. Jones? Well, maybe not, but I know what I like." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003) |
"It's thrilling to see a blockbuster gutsy enough to presuppose a certain degree of intelligence in the viewer. (It's also a great movie to see with your dad.)
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Match Point (2005) |
"...the same-old same-old dolled up in slightly swankier London duds --plus posh accents! Call it Crimes Without The Misdemeanors.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Matrix Reloaded (2003) |
"Call it: Exposition: The Movie! Or even better: A Brief History of Strange-Looking People Explaining the Plot to Keanu Reeves." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Matrix Revolutions (2003) |
"The good news is that Neo Christ Superstar is indeed an improvement over its buzz-kill predecessor. The bad news is that it's still terrible." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Mean Creek (2004) |
"Worth seeing... but it breaks your heart to watch such a complicated, perceptive movie drift into hand-wringing Afterschool Special territory.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Meet the Fockers (2004) |
"The awkward, uncomfortable charms of the previous picture have here been replaced with an aggressive vulgarity that bears not even a passing resemblance to human behavior." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Memento (2001) |
"...for all its formal wizardry, ultimately an ice-cold feat of intellectual gamesmanship. Once the novelty wears off, there's nothing left." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Memoirs of a Geisha (2005) |
"It's not a movie...it's a fashion show!" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Men in Black II (2002) |
"...the kind of movie you see because the theater has air conditioning." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Metallica: Some Kind of Monster (2004) |
"...a riveting fly-on-the-wall look at a dysfunctional family behaving badly during its darkest hours. (And it only feels like a sequel to Spinal Tap 30 % of the time.)" |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Miami Vice (2006) |
"You don't so much look at the screen as peer into it, mesmerized. Miami Vice's best scenes border on painterly abstractions --propulsive mini-symphonies of motion and color, punctuated by shocking bursts of violence." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Michael Clayton (2007) |
"This, ladies and gentlemen, is a Movie Star." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
A Mighty Heart (2007) |
"Jolie delivers a performance that's astonishing in its control.... she's dialed down her natural histrionics and gone for something far quieter and deeper than expected." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
A Mighty Wind (2003) |
"Sure, the film is fitfully amusing on a moment-to-moment basis. But less than a week later, I'd already forgotten I even saw it." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Milk (2008) |
"Like the inclusive American ideals its hero so staunchly advocates, this movie is open to everybody." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Million Dollar Baby (2004) |
"A model of unadorned precision--as plaintive, soulful and endlessly complicated in its direct simplicity as a Hemingway short story or a Springsteen song." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Millions (2005) |
"Somebody give this guy the next Harry Potter movie, please." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Minority Report (2002) |
"This thing is so good it's ridiculous. I feel like an embarrassed schoolgirl with a crush." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Miracle (2004) |
"A marvelous film-- enthralling, ecstatic and an illustration of everything Seabiscuit did wrong." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Missing (2003) |
"...the surface nastiness is a smokescreen for what lies beneath--a condescendingly multiculti Oprah-fied remake of The Searchers.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Mission: Impossible III (2006) |
"Abrams was apparently so busy reading his own press he never noticed that film has a distinctly different aesthetic language than television." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Monster-in-Law (2005) |
"There's a real hunger to Fonda's performance, an anything-can-happen quality that's more exciting than a thousand polished star turns." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Monsters vs. Aliens (2009) |
"It's not great -- but it's not bad -- and it's the first DreamWorks animated flick that won't feel dated by the time it hits home video." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Moon (2009) |
"There's a marvelous sense of isolation in the picture's cold, aloof setting and classical, still frames." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Moonlight Mile (2002) |
"Sure, I hated myself in the morning. But then again, I hate myself most mornings. I still like Moonlight Mile, better judgment be damned." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
The Mother (2004) |
"...grueling, oppressive and perhaps a bit too miserable for its own good--but I dare you to look away from it for even a second.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
The Motorcycle Diaries (2004) |
"Actors usually say the most thankless role in the canon is playing Jesus Christ--but after seeing Salles' Che Guevara by way of Johnny Appleseed, I beg to differ." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Moulin Rouge (2001) |
"Luhrmann rabidly Hoovers up a century or so worth of pop culture detritus and then projectile vomits it all over the screen with a vengeance." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Mr. and Mrs. Smith (2005) |
"Frisky and subversive, the movie argues that it's only after destroying icons of domesticity (and literally blowing up the McMansion) we can finally get to know one another." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Mr. Brooks (2007) |
"A nutzoid chiller devoted to proving the strange, unseemly notion that even bloodthirsty serial killers are more enjoyable company than bad MySpace comedians." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Mr. Deeds (2002) |
"I'm just too bored to care." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Mrs. Henderson Presents (2005) |
"You can take Harvey and Bob Weinstein away from Miramax --but you can't take that foolproof 'Miramax Formula' away from the Weinsteins." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
Mulholland Dr. (2001) |
"Lacking a single moment its director hasn't already done before and better, it feels like the flabby greatest hits medley from an over-the-hill pop star's oldies circuit tour." |
Sean Burns |
Tomato |
Munich (2005) |
"A Spielberg movie like none we've seen before - a searching, soul-sick piece of work. Munich does not pretend to have any answers. It only wants to remind us how much we've lost." |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
My Baby's Daddy (2004) |
"There's not a joke in the picture that isn't older than my cat.
" |
Sean Burns |
Splat |
My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009) |
"It's paint- by-numbers, puritanical kill-the-horny-kids garbage, with the usual graphic impalements offering up a Freudian minefield of vengeful penetrations... but 3-D sure is a nifty way to polish a turd." |
Sean Burns |
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